Am I the only one to ever get things out of focus? So often I can get caught up on the unimportant things and forget to focus on the things that really matter. There are tons of examples I could give but i'm going to focus on one specific one that has been on my mind lately, my daughter Lexi.
Lexi...gosh, how to even start? I've talked a lot on here about my kids and most of the time when talking about Lexi i'll say something about her being strong willed. I have been so overwhelmed and almost bewildered with her because of this and can easily get caught up in a battle with her. But I have to say the biggest most prominent battle with her has been potty training. Now any parent of a young child can attest to the fact that this is a huge thing in the raising of your child! Parents of other children around the same age as yours will ask questions about when your kids were trained and other things like that. Believe me when I say, it can be quite embarrassing talking to a parent of a 2 year old who is already trained and admitting that your 4 year old still is not!
I have been working with Lexi on this for the past 2 years. We have tried everything you can think of to get this girl trained! We've tried rewards, discipline for accidents, panties only, pull-ups...and the list goes on and on. I have fought and laughed and rejoiced when it finally works and cried when she's had 10 accidents in one morning. She's had really good days and really, really bad days and I have to admit that my mood and our relationship can change on those bad days. We actually went to her dr this week to talk to him about it. I just needed to find out if there's anything I could be trying that i'm not. But he said she's perfectly normal and she'll do it when she's good and ready.
So I finally stopped and thought about everything, and I figured something out. I have been completely out of focus when it comes to her! I have spent so much time focusing on what she isn't doing and have completely missed what she is and has been doing. In the past few months my Lexi's personality has started changing. Now don't get me wrong, she can still dig her heels in on something and it takes quite a battle to get her to change. But on a whole, her personality has gotten sweeter, she minds quicker (most of the time), she adores Logyn and plays with her so well, and so many other wonderful things. I have spent so much time focusing on something that isn't even a personality trait. My job as a mom is to teach and train and shape her as a person. Where does potty training fall under those 3 things? It doesn't. Plan and simple! Yes, I would love for her to be trained and it still is hard to swallow my pride in my skills as a mother in this area but in no way does it change anything about my daughter. I know that she will not enter her teen years still in pull-ups so it's all good! haha
So I have decided to get back in focus and look at all the wonderful things that make up my little girl. This doesn't mean that I won't grow frustrated when accidents happen, I am still human after all! But I will stop making such a HUGE deal out of all of this. She will learn when she learns. Until then, i'm going to learn how to completely enjoy my daughter and remember that my job is so much more than just potty training her. Now excuse me while I go give her a great big hug! :o)