I just realized that in all my posts about marriage I have not discussed the oh so lovely topic of submission, so let's get talking!
Submission is something that I believe every woman struggles with during their marriage. It is very difficult to do and is often thrown out as an outdated practice, but I believe that it is still something that is required of every married woman. But did you know that submission was not God's original design for women? If you go back to the very beginning and look at the surroundings of Eve's creation, she was never designed to be submissive to Adam, she was designed to help him and rule beside him. It wasn't until after her and Adam sinned that submission entered the picture. Look at Genesis 3:16, God is telling Eve what the consequences are for her having eaten the fruit from the tree. It says "Then he said to the woman, "I will sharpen the pain of your pregnancy, and in pain you will give birth. And you will desire to control your husband, but he will rule over you."
Right at the beginning of the bible we girls are warned that submission won't be easy, and the reason for that is because we aren't designed for it. It's a part of the curse of sin. But we have to remember that even though it wasn't part of the original design, after the sin in the garden of Eden it became the design. The bible is very clear about the fact that we girls are to submit to our husbands. The bible talks about it in many verses so let's look at some of them.
Colossians 3:18 " Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting for those who belong to the Lord.
Ephesians 5:22-24 "For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything.
Titus 2:4-5 "These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands.
I Peter 3:1 "In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over"
So it's very clear from these verses that submission is something that is required of us girls, however the definition of submission is often where people can get confused. So again, let's look at what the bible says submission is. The definition of submission found in the concordance is "to submit to one's control, to yield to one's admonition or advice, to obey, be subject". Now, as unpleasant as that may sound look at it a different way for just a minute with me. That same definition is used when talking about several other kinds of submission in the bible.
Romans 13:1 says "Everyone must submit to governing authorities. For all authority comes from God, and those in positions of authority have been placed there by God." That "submit" has the same definition in the concordance.
Ephesians 1:22 says "God has put all things under the authority of Christ and has made him head over all things for the benefit of the church." and that has the same definition as well.
We're to submit to our husbands the same way we submit to Christ. Also, Hebrews 5:7 says "During the days of Jesus’ life on earth, he offered up prayers and petitions with fervent cries and tears to the one who could save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverent submission." So you can see here that Christ himself showed this same kind of submission to God the Father when He lived on earth.
Submission is not some scary, awful thing! When it is done according to the bible it is actually a beautiful demonstration of the relationship we have with Christ. Now I understand that as with everything in this world, the issue of submission absolutely can be abused and I want you to understand that I am not talking about women being doormats! I fully believe that each and every woman is an equal partner in their marriage and should voice their thoughts and opinions freely, and men should listen to them and take what they say to heart. You and your husbands are a team and should do everything you can to live in agreement. I believe that this submission is referring to areas of disagreement in your family. If you and your husband are on completely opposite ends of an issue this is where I think submission falls in and the wife should submit to her husbands authority and decisions, because let's not forget that he is ultimately the one who will stand before God and answer for how he leads your family.
This is not an easy thing to do at all! Remember, you weren't designed to submit. It does not come natural to you and that's ok. You're not a horrible person if and when you fail in this area. But you have to remember that as un-natural as submission feels, as christians we are not to walk in the natural, we are to walk in the super-natural! I believe that when you submit to your husband even if you don't agree God can bless you in that. I heard it said once that God can jump over a goofy husband to bless a submissive wife and I believe that to be true. When you submit to your husband understand that you are actually obeying and submitting to Christ and that's what each and every christian should strive for.
Next Monday my husband will be writing a guest post on the role husbands play, because in all reality, it's not enough for wives to just be submissive without men also knowing what it means to lead the family.