Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Communication Part 4: More on good communication

I love to talk to my husband, he is my best friend and there's nothing that I can't talk about with him. I love to talk about our days, our kids, our families, our future, about everything really. By talking about all of those things we can both continue to learn so much about each other. It's through talking that we learn everything about each other, it's how we learned when we were dating and how we continue to learn now.

There are some things in marriage that it's so important for couples to talk and communicate about. Just a few of those things are...

Your dreams It's so important to realize that you both have dreams for you future. You both have places you want your family it go and ideas of how things will turn out. Take time on a regular basis to dream together. I love talking with my husband about our future! We sit and picture the house we'll live in someday, dream about building a house. We dream about future careers, what life will be like once the kids grow up and move out, what life will be like with grandkids. It's all future stuff but it's so much fun to dream together! You have to remember that you got married to build a life together when you quite dreaming together you are simply just surviving.

Your plans This one can seem like it falls under the dreaming category but it is different. Your plans are things that are happening now. They can be anything from your plans for the weekend to your plans for a budget, or how to discipline your children, when to get a pet...the list goes on and on. Your plans are the day to day part of your life and it's so important to include each other in every aspect of that. At any given moment of a day my husband and I can both tell you where the other person will be. We both know each other's schedules and activities. It's not about keeping tabs on each other, for us it's simply a conscious effort to include each other in our days and our lives.

Your needs Every person needs something from their spouse. It can be simple, or it can be very complex. But do you take the time to tell your spouse exactly what you need? Having to tell your spouse that you need something from them does not mean they have failed you in some way or they don't know you. I remember thinking that early on in our marriage but it was a very naive and immature thought. There is no possible way for Colby know absolutely every single thing I need from him or just in general without my voicing those needs to him. Now he has gotten very good at reading me and can usually tell, but he is not perfect nor is he a mind reader and it would be silly of me to expect him to be.

There are so many other examples I could give but they would pretty much fall under these categories. It's just so important to make talking to your spouse a habit. Learn to talk to them about anything and everything. Include them in everything about your life, after all, you did chose them to be your partner in every area of your life!

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This post is linked up with Time Warp Wife, Raising Homemakers and Women Living Well.

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