Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Made it through Monday

Can you believe it? We survived Konner's first day of school, and even survived his second day!! Who knew we'd all actually make it! Let me tell you, leaving your 5 year old son in a big room full of people he doesn't know at all is so much harder than you'd ever imagine!

I had such a hard time going to sleep on Sunday, all I could think about was leaving my tiny little boy in that room by himself (and yes, he is still tiny!). I have not ever had to leave him anywhere other than a family members house and I was extremely nervous about it. But he was awesome!! I was so proud of him, to me he was absolutely the bravest little boy in the world!

A few days before I had asked him what he wanted for breakfast. I told him this was a very special breakfast because it was his first day of school so I would make whatever he wanted. I listed several different things that I know he loves, breakfast casserole, pumpkin muffins, pancakes...anything he wanted. Out of all those options he picked Malt-O-Meal! Only Konner would ever pick Malt-O-Meal! :o) But he loved it and was so excited.

When we got to his school we took him into the Movement Room, found the row for his class and he sat right down. Colby snapped a few pictures, we gave him kiss-hug-and-bye (our routine before going anywhere) and that was it. He sat right down with the other kids and started watching Curious George until it was time to go to his class. Somehow he wasn't nervous at all. He didn't seem upset in the least that we were leaving him there. In fact the only thing that bothered him was that people kept walking in front of him so he couldn't see the tv. :o) I have no idea how he did so well, I would have been a nervous wreck.

(Right before we left the house)

(Watching Curious George)

I can't even begin to tell you how weird it was to have him gone all day. The house is so very quiet without him. The girls are very mellow when he's not here. And yes, it is weird to get only 2 cups instead of 3! Lexi had no idea what to do with him gone either. When it was time for lunch she actually didn't want to eat, she said she would wait to eat until Konner got home and went to lay down for her nap. She was so excited to see him when we picked him up!

As good as he did when we dropped him off, he had a very hard time when we picked him up! There was such relief on his face when he saw me standing there. As we walked back to the car I asked him all about his day and he broke down. He ended up just sobbing and telling me it was such a very long day. He asked me to please not bring him back. :o( I'm telling you, my heart broke right then! I knew I would have to take him back and I told him as much. He just hugged me and cried.

I felt like the worst mom in the world! How could I take him there every day and just leave him? I'm supposed to protect him and take care of him, that's my job! It's been hard enough just thinking about this experience but now it's here and he hates it?! I felt like my heart was breaking the whole way home.

On the way home I took him to get a chocolate coke from Sonic and he asked me if we could sit on the couch with a blanket when we got home. He said he wanted to have a long talk all about his day. Yet another heart breaking/melting moment. They came one after the other all day! :o) So of course we did sit and talk when we got home. As I started talking to him and asking him questions all about it he totally opened up and couldn't stop telling me all about it. Turns out he had a pretty good day, it was just very very long! That was such a relief!

Yesterday was even better, although he did say it was longer than the first day! :o) And i'm believing that each day will continue to improve! I've said for months now that I really think this is the best option for him and how much I think he'll enjoy it. It's just going to take a week or two to get him adjusted. It's good for me though, I spend a lot of the day praying for him that's for sure!

Anyways, I just had to share how everything went. It was hard and had some very sad moments but we all made it through and things are getting better and easier every day! :o)

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