I have discovered something about myself over the course of my marriage...I am a fighter! There are some days that I seem to wake up in the mood to fight and anyone who walks by could be under attack at any moment. Anyone else ever have days like this? Please tell me i'm not alone!
As awful as this personality trait may be there is actually a wonderful side to it and i've discovered that it's very important to wake up everyday ready to fight in your marriage. We just have to understand that we're not fighting our spouse! See, everyday Satan is ready to attack your marriage and family but I don't think that we're always ready for it. The bible says in 1 Peter 5:8 "Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour."
Satan would love nothing more than to destroy each and every marriage and he's actually gotten to be really good at it! In today's society it's very difficult to stay married, much less have a strong and healthy marriage and I think so many couples don't even know they're under attack. Many times people get married with the idea that it's going to all be love and roses and they're not prepared at all for the fight that they're in for.
You have to understand, when you get married, you become one. You are no longer two people living two lives. But so often I see couples walking, living and making choices as if they were still two separate people and therefore they fight like two separate people. In order for your marriage to be effective, you have to walk together and even learn how to fight together.
Let's face it, married life can be hard! You have come from completely different backgrounds and you both have different ways of doing pretty much everything. At first it may not seem like a big deal but after awhile you can begin to see your spouse as the enemy. They become the person you must conquer. If things have gotten to that point, stop right where you are! It doesn't matter if you feel like you're in the right and they're completely wrong. Just stop fighting against them!
See, when you spend all your time fighting each other, you are actually fighting against your marriage not just against your spouse. However when you turn things around and start fighting FOR your marriage you build up and strengthen it.
It's so important to understand that no matter what the situation, you and your spouse are to be on the same side. There should never be a situation where you are fighting against each other. You make yourselves and your marriage completely useless when you fight against each other. But once you start fighting with each other you begin to get some power to behind your marriage!
Ecclesiastes 4:12 says "A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken." No matter what the situation you may be facing, take the stand together. Fight together. Include God in the situation and wrap yourselves so tight in Him that the strand of the three of you cannot be broken. It's way past time for couples to stop fighting against their marriages and start fighting for them.