Day 10 (Feb 10) "Love is unconditional" Rom. 5:8
When you rebuild your marriage with agape love as its foundation, then the friendship and romantic aspects of your love become more endearing than ever before. When your enjoyment of each other as best friends and lovers is based on unwavering commitment, you will experience an intimacy that cannot be achieved any other way.
Day 10 challenge is...Do something out of the ordinary today for your spouse-something that proves (to you and to them) that your love is based on your choice and nothing else. Wash her car. Clean the kitchen. Buy his favorite dessert. Fold the laundry. Demonstrate love to them for the sheer joy of their partner in marriage.
Ok, this was also a really good chapter so i'm going to take a few quotes out to share with y'all. Yes, I said y'all. I'm a Texan. Lets move on.
"If someone were to ask you 'Why do you love your wife?' or 'Why do you love your husband?'--what would you say?"
Would your response be something about their good looks or their personality? For men, would it be something about how she's a good cook or a wonderful mother? "But what if over the course of years, your wife or husband stopped being every one of these things. Would you still love them? Based on the answers above, the only logical answer would be 'no'. If your reasons for loving your spouse all have something to do with his or her qualities-and then those same qualities disappear-your basis for love is over. The only way love can last a lifetime is if it's unconditional. The truth is this: love is not determined by the one being loved but rather by the one choosing to love.
That is a lot to swallow isn't it? I had to stop and really think about this one. I know that if someone were to ask me why I love my husband I would list off things about his character and things he does for me and our family. But is that the extent of it?
I love my husband. With everything I have in me I love him. There is no doubt of that in my mind or in his. But...what if everything about him were to change? Would I continue to love him? Would you be able to?
"If your marriage totally depends on having common interests or enjoying a healthy sex life, then the foundation of your relationship is unstable. Agape love on the other hand, is selfless and unconditional. So unless this kind of love forms the foundation of your marriage, the wet and tear of time will destroy it. Agape love is 'in sickness and health' love, 'for richer or poorer' love, 'for better or worse' love. It is the only kind of love is true love. That's because this is God's kind of love. He doesn't love us because we are lovable but because He is so loving."
"But you will struggle and fail to attain this kind of marriage unless you allow God to begin growing His love within you. Love that 'bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things' (1 Corinthians 13:7) does not come from within. It can only come from God. And don't be surprise, when your spouse begins living confidently under it's shade, if he or she doesn't become even more lovable to you than you remember. You will no longer say 'I love you because...' You will now say, 'I love you period.' "
So take some time today, find something you can do for your spouse, that shows them you love them. Find a way to show them that Agape love. If you are at a place in your marriage that you don't feel the Agape love for them, take the time to pray for your spouse and ask Jesus to help you grow that love inside of you. If Jesus is in you, His love is in you, and His love is Agape love.